Before We Talk About Virtue Again - I Need to Be Transparent With You.
Before We Talk About Virtue Again
I Need to Be Transparent With You.
I had originally intended to write about the benefits that come as a result of establishing a virtuous culture in your work, family, and community. However, before I finish that message and post it - I wanted to take a step back and be really transparent in acknowledging why this topic of virtue is so important to me personally and professionally - and why I feel discussing and exploring virtue is so incredibly significant, relevant, and important at this particular point and time.
Okay - I promise I will make a connection with my focus on virtue - but it’s important I start here:
Prior to the series we created on Benjamin Franklin and his Art of Virtue - I began constructing an online course that is designed to guide members through a step by step process where they establish an Authentic identity and mindset; create an actionable blueprint that builds Authenticity into their life and work; and ultimately leads to developing Authentic connection, relationships, and community.
I was inspired to develop this project through the work I have been doing with my coaching clients over the past 12+ years, the example my grandfather set for me in being an Authentic exemplar, some of the research and science I had come across in the field of Positive Psychology, and because of my personal struggles with feeling so inauthentic for the first 25+ years of my life.
The consequences of living my life so inauthentically really created a lot of pain, shame, fear, sadness, and worst of all - I wasted a lot of time and energy chasing after the wrong objectives and not being true to myself and my unique calling. Instead - I lived my life trying to feel good by gaining other people’s approval, defining success through external measures, frequently feeling the pain of impostor syndrome, feeling busy - but not purposeful, and realizing that even when I was “successful” - the success didn’t feel fulfilling or particularly meaningful.
While this is really uncomfortable to acknowledge - I feel like it is important for me to be open about my struggles with living and feeling so inauthentically. I see the pain and suffering that inauthenticity is creating with the clients that I work with, in families that I hear about through some of the charitable organizations I am involved with, and in society - as we hear about the mental health crisis that we are experiencing with this younger generation.
“Authenticity is the antidote to shame.”
While this is a remarkably powerful statement on its own rights - I will humbly add that I see Authenticity as the antithesis to shame. If we can think of mental health/wellness as existing on a spectrum from -10 to +10 (with -10 representing severe/debilitating emotional distress or illness - and +10 representing thriving or flourishing mental wellness) then experiencing toxic shame leads to a life on the negative end of this spectrum - and Authenticity will promote a lifestyle that exists firmly on the positive end.
Although it was clear to me that living Authentically was the pathway to establishing a life of greater purpose, meaning, significance, fulfillment, and impact - I recognized a need to establish a clear understanding of what it means to be Authentic and experience Authentic connection. Unfortunately, the term “Authentic” gets thrown around very loosely - which has diluted the impact and value that this term warrants. I also wanted to establish what Authenticity should look and feel like - and identify a practical process for establishing Authenticity.
In my efforts to effectively establish the criteria pertaining to Authenticity - I dug into the history of this word, its actual meaning, I read thousands of pages on this topic, and I interviewed dozens and dozens of colleagues, friends, family, and people that I respect and hold in high regard - and who were kind enough to engage in a discussion that wasn’t particularly light or simple!!
What came out of all of this research and exploration on Authenticity was something that was deeply enlightening, meaningful, powerful, and truly transformational for me - as it helped me to see how I could create a practical model for establishing Authenticity - and lean on leverage points that would greatly increase the likelihood that clients would take the action steps necessary to experience an Authentic transformation.
While I don’t want to go into all of the details about what I discovered in my journey to identify Authenticity (this message is long enough!!) - I will acknowledge that practicing virtue through character strengths - and implementing this in our relationships to establish virtuous culture - is absolutely foundational to living Authentically - and this is why I have been so focused on digging into and exploring the nature and benefits of living virtuously.
I am beyond excited to share some of the incredible research, content, and relevant material I discovered in my deep dive to understand Authenticity. And while I realize that everybody may not get as excited as I do about these topics - I promise to make the payoff worthwhile as I release the material related to Authenticity (I will have some free giveaways and bonus materials that I will release along the way). Most importantly, my goal and mission is to empower you and anyone that you are in relationship with to experience the radical benefits of living Authentically - and therefore to increase the number of people that are experiencing life on as far of the right hand side of the mental wellness spectrum as is possible!!
In next week’s message - I will explore what it means to establish a virtuous culture - how this can lead to a virtuous cycle (yes, this is an actual thing - and I will describe what it is and why it should matter to you!) and the benefits of establishing a virtuous culture in your family, business, learning environment, and community.
Then we will dive into character strengths - and I will identify how to unlock the closest thing we have to real human superpowers!
Each week I will release another message that is essential to establishing Authenticity - unpacking what I discovered in my journey to understand Authenticity - ultimately leading to the launch of my digital course in January.